Hi Daddy,
To be honest, writing this makes me sad. I feel as though I have missed out on something, but I guess beating myself up about it would be a waste of time and emotional energy at this point... Anyways, I just wanted to start off by saying I'm sorry. I'm sorry that for such a large portion of my life I knew nothing about where you came from or our family's story. In reality, the situation was truly to blame; however, I feel guilty for not doing anything about it. So much of who I am comes from you and our relationship, and I apologize for not caring enough to inquire about the experiences that made you who you are. As I reflect on the 18+ years I spent in the dark, I am simply shocked that it never crossed my mind to ask. I wish I had asked. I wish I had learned. I was so naive and focused on things that don't even matter that much. I wish I had spent more of my time learning who you were, and who I was as a result. For example, I wish you had taught me Tagalog or that I had asked visited the Philippines. Living in Muwekma has showed me how special it is to come from a different culture. It was truly a blessing to have a parent that came from such a different cultural background, but it is quite unfortunate that I haven't really taken advantage of it in anyway.
Nevertheless, I am glad we have now. I will probably be shy about it (it as in talking/revealing everything I don't know) for the next couple of years. I'm not the most confident gal in our relationship dynamic for who knows what reason... Maybe, I'll even wait until I graduate from here, but at least now I know and I won't forget. Growing up, I always told people I was a Japanese girl, and I am still a Japanese girl. However, now I know that it was the filipino blood that runs through my veins which has allowed me to be both savvy and resilient. I am not just a Japanese girl. I come from a long line of academics and national scientists in the Philippines. I promise to make them and you proud.
Love Always,
Kelli
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